I hold her little hand
as we step off the curb.
She looks up at me, smiles.
Her curls catch sunlight,
And then she is gone.
Just gone. No curls.
No warm hand in mine.
I chase absence into
busy road. She is not there.
She is nowhere.
I cannot find her.
That which is precious
I cannot keep safe,
cannot hold close.
Mystery snatches love.
I can't be good enough
to protect my children
I can't be good enough
to keep love safe.
Effort is not sufficient.
Dilligence may not hold.
Loss lurks in the sunlight.
Victoria, I hear you in regard to this dream. It is a fear of mine with my granddaughter too. I keep wanting to hold her hand, to keep her safe; but what if she is not? It is a dread I have, that she might become lost somehow. I keep my eye on her, but what if something happens in only an instant.....you captured the fear.
ReplyDeleteYes Mary, this fear is with me waking too when I am out with one of the little ones.
ReplyDeleteYou expressed a it quite well...I think every parent has got this fear hidden.....and I loved what you have written there in your profile about yourself...
ReplyDeleteI feel this. Just being constantly aware of keeping them safe, well and loved, is doing what a good mother ought to be doing. But, it is a worry.
ReplyDeleteOh, this is the worst nightmare of all!
ReplyDeleteWell I can certainly relate to your nightmare of grief and loss ~ I am always trying to keep an eye on my young daughter ~ Wonderful share ~
ReplyDeleteYes, this IS the worst nightmare of all. The hardest thing for a parent/grandparent is knowing we cant always keep them safe, however hard we try. You wrote this so wonderfully. You captured the feeling perfectly. May all the little ones stay safe!
ReplyDeleteThank you for all the empathetic comments. This poem and nightmare must run deep with me because I didn't know how it was going to come out until I started writing and then it just came.
ReplyDeleteWonderful heartfelt write.
ReplyDelete"That which is precious
I cannot keep safe,
cannot hold close."
K
I too have had this fear...you have stated it so well and honestly
ReplyDeleteOh the horror...this is a nightmare no matter if you are sleeping or awake. What a powerful write.
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ReplyDeleteHow scary the dream. It really makes me feel the disappearance. How true that we cannot keep them safe. I can't imagine how it must feel for parents in Syria, Darfur, Myanmar, and other places where it is more reality than fear.
ReplyDeletepowerful
ReplyDelete